It's been quite the journey.
Today is my 48th birthday. It's an important one for a few reasons. In 2007 the Dr told me I was in such bad health that I would have a stroke in 2 years and in 3 years I'd be dead. As you can see I am NOT dead. I reversed that prediction and I have Dr Singh and weight loss surgery to thank for that. As well as my friends and family for the support along the way, and it goes without saying to God for preparing the way for me to get out of the death trap I was in.
I have to say I didn't believe I'd ever really get back to a normal size. Not for a long time. I've lost weight before and always found it again plus many more pounds.
Even when I was small (aka high school photo) I didn't think I was small, my image of myself was not positive at all. I thought I was fat and ugly and not worth very much.
That is no longer the case. It took a long time to finally admit that it was OK to like and yes even LOVE myself. That does not mean I am self centered or conceited. Well maybe sometimes, lol.
Being overweight was a shelter and a burden for me. I hid behind the weight because it gave people a reason to look down on me, and I think deep down I thought if I ever lost the weight I'd have nothing to hide behind and then when people didn't like me there would be nothing to blame except myself.
Now I guess I don't care, if you don't like me it's your loss. I'm a great friend. And if you mistreat me or use me well again that's your loss. Unfortunately I hate to say that has happened recently, but when it did I did not turn to food to feed the hole that was left behind, I have truly changed the way I think and who I am.
I was saying the surgery did NOT change me but I guess it did. I am confident, I am energetic, I am HUMAN.
So I even cut my hair off, what was left anyway. Turns out everyone thinks I look better and younger with short hair, who'd a thunk it?
One last comment, school is going great. It's a lot of work and I am just a little overwhelmed but it's FUN. Not much time for other things, like blogging, but I will try to get here when I can.
